TOUCHING Message from A DYING MOTHER

I had to tell my children this is our last Christmas together

By Daily Mail Reporter
Last updated at 3:12 PM on 10th December 2010

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A dying mother revealed today how she is preparing to spend a final Christmas with her two small children after she was diagnosed with a terminal illness.

Donna Young, 32, mother of five-year-old daughter Phoebe and two-year-old son Jack, has been given just months to live after being diagnosed with a rare, inoperable lung cancer that mainly affects young women.

The former NHS psychiatric nurse from Preston, said: 'I knew my cancer was inoperable, but deep down, I had hoped I would still be around for a few years and enjoy more time with my children.

'I did hit rock bottom when I realised I only had months left, but then I gave myself a good talking to, picked myself up, and decided to make the most of what time I had left.'

Donna Young was diagnosed with a rare, inoperable lung cancer that mainly affects young women. She has urged other women to push for tests if they think something is wrong

One of the most difficult things Donna has had to do is break the news about her diagnosis to her daughter Phoebe.

Donna said: 'It was a really difficult and agonising thing to have to do, as the last thing you want to do is upset your children.

'But a child's imagination can be far worse than the truth, and I knew I had to tell Phoebe now.

'I told her mummy had got more poorly, and that the doctors have said she will be going to heaven.

'Phoebe got very upset and said it wasn't fair, and that she would miss me and that she wouldn't be able to cuddle me any more.

'She sat there sobbing for about half-an-hour and then she asked me how I was going to get to heaven. I told her the angels would come and take me, and she then wanted to know if I would come back after they had made me better.

'I then had to gently explain that once I was gone, I wouldn't be coming back, but there would be lots of people to look after her and Jack.

'It was one of the hardest things I have had to do and it broke my heart.'

Donna remembers first suffering from a cough when she was pregnant with Phoebe, but when she mentioned it to a midwife, she was told not to worry about it as pregnant women produce more mucus, which can make them cough.

Then, when Phoebe was about six or seven months old, Donna woke up in agony with a searing pain in her side, and went to primary care where she was told she had pneumonia, but no tests or x-rays were carried out.

'Phoebe got very upset and said it wasn't fair, and that she would miss me and that she wouldn't be able to cuddle me any more.'

Donna carried on suffering from recurrent chest infections, and when she was eight-months' pregnant with Jack, she was admitted to hospital after she began coughing up blood.

However, because she was pregnant, doctors were unable to carry out too many tests.

But even after she gave birth to Jack, it wasn't until April last year that doctors did a biopsy of Donna's lung which revealed the cancer.

Donna said: 'It is a small cell type lung cancer which is particularly rare and predominantly affects young women. It is not related to smoking, but is a rare and genetic form of the disease.

'Since being diagnosed, I have been worrying about my children as I don't want them to get it in the future. I have been particularly concerned about Phoebe, as the type of cancer mainly affects women and she is very similar to me in a lot of ways.

'But doctors have told me that the kids will be screened when they are older, and this has helped put my mind at rest.'

Donna is planning to enjoy a quiet family Christmas and says she has spoiled her children more than usual, as she knows it will be her last Christmas with them.

She has already put together memory boxes for Phoebe and Jack for after she has gone. She has even bought them presents for their 18th birthdays, including a necklace with her fingerprint in it for Phoebe

Donna said: 'I know I am not lucky as I have this cancer, but I am fortunate as I have the chance to say my goodbyes and plan for my children's futures.

'Some people lose their life at my age suddenly, but I know what is coming and can do things before I go.

'I am just trying to stay as positive as possible, and hopefully prove the doctors wrong and still be here for next Christmas.'

She added: 'My advice to people would be that if you believe something is wrong, don't just get fobbed off, keep pushing and pushing until you are tested.'

Donna's mother Barbara Lawrensone, 53, said: 'We have shed a lot of tears. It is awful to see your daughter in this position.

'I look at her and just wish I could take it away from her. I wish it was me instead of Donna.'

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1337386/Donna-Young-tell-children-Christmas-together.html#ixzz17j2erk3R